Last Updated: May 26, 1999
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The American Editor
The write stuff: Winning heads and
leads
Of the Wienermobile, bass and holes-in-one
By Brian Cooper
I think it would only be sporting if we started this edition of The
Write Stuff with four headlines concerning sports. Let’s tee it up with:
Can’t beat this pair of aces
(By Rich Gotshall, The Indianapolis Star, on a 14-year-old "cart
boy" who, playing with golf clubs borrowed from the pro shop, notched two
holes-in-one during one round.)
***
Zoeller set to progress past knock on Woods
(Penny Walker, The University Daily Kansan, on pro golfer Fuzzy
Zoeller in the wake of his controversial "joke" about Masters champion
Tiger Woods.)
***
Fishy story turns scales of justice bass-awkward
(Bruce Brothers of the St. Paul (Minn.) Pioneer Press, over a story
about a young angler who fibbed about where he caught a "prize-winning"
bass. The lad wanted to win the paper’s contest but protect his special
fishing spot. Readers noted that the lake where the boy said he caught
the fish is off-limits to bass fishing.)
***
Absence of mallets feared
(By Joel Pisetzner of The Star-Ledger, Newark, N.J., on speculation
that the Green Gables Croquet Club might close. For good measure, the overline
read: Croquet tradition at stake.)
Pisetzner also produced one of those headlines that you must read again,
just to savor the craftsmanship:
No matter where you’ve been, there you are
(On a wire story that followed the subhead: You leave your genetic
marker on everything you touch by shedding DNA, scientists report.)
***
These editors weren’t hot-dogging it when they wrote:
Chicago might make wieners losers
(By John Cushman, The Oregonian, Portland, on a Windy City housing
developer’s plan that could force closure of a sausage plant.)
***
Animal-rights group can’t cut the mustard
Red-hot Oscar Mayer Wienermobile turns protesters into so much smoked
sausage
(Conrad Bibens, Houston Chronicle, on a People for the Ethical Treatment
of Animals demonstration that backfired.)
Bibens also checked in with:
Tests push Neanderthals out of human family tree
(On DNA research that caused scientists to conclude that a Neanderthal
was too distant genetically to have been an ancestor of modern humans.)
***
Houston, we have no problem with this out-of-this-world headline:
Alienable rites
Roswell festival marks 50th year since ‘UFO’ crash
(Bill Gould, Houston Chronicle, about this summer’s celebration
in Roswell, N.M.)
***
Global heart-warming
Janet Voinovich bonds foreign friendships for Warren students
(By Mark Spang, The Plain Dealer, Cleveland, on the Ohio first lady’s
efforts to build educational and cultural ties while on her husband’s trade
missions.)
***
Hale-Bopp plot? NASA says, ‘Not’
(By Tim Manning, a colleague at the Telegraph Herald, Dubuque, Iowa,
on a wire story reporting that the space agency was fending off accusations
— incorrect — that it was engaging in a cover-up by not using the Hubble
telescope to photograph the departing comet.)
***
Dressed to till
(By John Hawn, The Indianapolis Star and The Indianapolis News,
on a feature about what people wear when they garden.)
***
Was Stewart’s life wonderful?
Well, shucks ... it sure was
(By Sandy Ingham, Asbury Park Press, Neptune, N.J., after the death
of acting legend Jimmy Stewart.)
***
You could help make your reporters and copy editors legends in their
own write. Submit their best headlines and leads to The Write Stuff.
Cooper is executive editor of the Telegraph Herald, Dubuque, Iowa.
Contact him at P.O. Box 688, Dubuque, IA 52004-0688 or bcooper@wcinet.com
